By Joanna Nicholson, MA, RCC As we continue to engage in social distancing and self-isolation, many of our roles and responsibilities have changed due to the COVID-19 virus. Parents, foster parents, and caregivers will have to support their children’s learning from home while balancing other responsibilities and changes. Children are also experiencing change as they have not returned to school following spring break, daily routine has shifted, and social groups are fairly non existent. With no clear timeline on when …

One Foster Boy’s Untold Story and the Family that Showed him Immense Love & Acceptance By Caroline Bailey, MC, Foster Parent Extraordinaire *printed with permission* Tonight, after 2.5 years of living here, my oldest son sat down at the table with this. He was about to chow down when I stopped him and asked what in the world he was doing. He said, “I made myself dinner.” “But it isn’t cooked. I can cook that you know.” “Well, I wanted …

Summer, Sunshine, and Stress by Nicole Fakaua, M.C., R.C.C. Summer holidays usually conjure up images of sunshine, sweet watermelon, and happy kids playing along the beach.   But let’s face it, for many kids with a trauma background, summer holidays can also be stressful!  Normal routines have been bypassed by longer, leisurely days filled with a …

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KIDS & TECHNOLOGY – DAMAGING OR DISCONNECTING? (Part 1) By Angela Murphy, School Psychologist Once when I was visiting a family, the 12-year old adopted son *Josh, took me to his room to show me his game.  Within a 5-minute time span I saw his very real looking character smoke marijuana, pick up a prostitute, run down a police officer, and the boy talked about killing his family next (in the game).  By the time I stood up to leave …

The Great Disconnect by David Brown As a professional clinician, I have been ruminating on the possibility that as therapists and other forms of helpers, we often deny our own embedded emotional pain, trauma, shame and vulnerability.  I think we often will use our professional role as a basis for deciding that our best course …

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The Value of PACE in Parenting by Lisa Frede Have you noticed that “parenting as usual” seems to be backfiring with your child? Do you have a child that retaliates with rage and aggression to traditional discipline? Rather than using conventional behavior modification strategies which may trigger rejection and shame (and the big behaviors that …

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Anxiety, Physiological Responses and it’s Connection to Complex Trauma By Nicole Fakaua, M.C., R.C.C Sherri was 11 years old and woke up most mornings complaining her tummy ached and had trouble eating her breakfast.  Her foster father Mike noticed that every time they would drive to her visitations with her bio mom, she would rub …

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Compassion and Shame: When Your Best Interventions Seem to Backfire Little Lisa is sometimes crazed with fury and hatred and often directs this toward her foster mom, Susan. Susan has been learning a lot about shame and connection so she understands that Lisa is lashing out at her because she fears being hurt and being …

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