Emotional Regulation Skills for Traumatized Youth  (A DBT Approach) by Lisa Frede, M.A., R.C.C Strong, painful emotions are a part of being human, especially part of being a teen or pre-teen, and even more so part of being a young person with a background in complex trauma. We all can benefit from learning more about how emotions work in our minds and bodies. Understanding what they are, identifying the urges that accompany them, and putting words to the experience, helps …

Compassion and Shame: When Your Best Interventions Seem to Backfire Little Lisa is sometimes crazed with fury and hatred and often directs this toward her foster mom, Susan. Susan has been learning a lot about shame and connection so she understands that Lisa is lashing out at her because she fears being hurt and being rejected. She recognizes that her behavior is an expression of her underlying needs and fears and therefore, Susan now knows she needs to respond to …

“I hate you!” Screamed 6-year-old Lily, her face scrunched up into a snarl. “I hope you die and all your kids die too!” Her foster mom, Jen took a deep breath. Sometimes keeping the attitude of being playful, accepting, curious and empathic (PACE) that Daniel Hughes suggests is key in working with traumatized children felt impossible. “Oh, Lily I see you’re upset. You must be really mad that you have to put away something fun. I get that it would …

Relationship Repair by: Dr. Kirk Austin It seemed that every time Johnny returned from visiting his mother he would have an “off day”. He had spent the last year in a foster home because his mother was unable to care for him. Her mental health and addiction issues had provided the backdrop of their relationship over the last ten years. His removal from his mother was hard for him. Despite her struggles, he cared for her. She was the only …